How to Flourish with Strong Boundaries and Healthy Life Balance

I notice more and more, as I run my business, that one of the things I find challenging is finding balance. When I decide to do something, it’s all-or-nothing, and I find that taking care of myself can take second place. Here’s an interesting exercise to explore your life balance:

• Fold a piece of paper into four; tear or cut the fourths into separate pieces.

• Write down four people you love the most—one on each piece of paper.

• Now, tear one up and throw it away.

• Then do it again… and again… until you have one left.

Look at the last remaining piece of paper.

• Who was the last one left?
• Was it you?
• Were you even one of the four?

This exercise is not about guilt.
It’s about awareness.

If you did not include yourself, that tells a story — not of failure, but of conditioning. Many of us were taught to care for others first and ourselves last. But self-care is not selfishness. It is stewardship of the life you’ve been given.

You cannot pour from an empty cup.
You cannot live your purpose if you are depleted.

After this exercise, consider something we’ve all heard before.

When you are on a plane, flight attendants instruct parents and caregivers to put on their own oxygen masks before assisting their children. They understand something essential: without oxygen, you cannot help anyone.

The same is true in your life.

When you take care of yourself first — emotionally, physically, spiritually — you are not neglecting others. You are strengthening your capacity to love and serve them well.

And sometimes, when you stop overextending yourself, others are given the opportunity to grow, contribute, and take responsibility.

Scripture reminds us:
“Love your neighbor as yourself.”

Notice it does not say instead of yourself.
It says as yourself.

The only way to love another well is to understand what loving yourself looks and feels like.

When you learn to care for your own heart — when you honor your limits, your needs, and your worth — that love does not stay contained. It overflows.

Your Value

The value you hold for yourself shapes how you see the value of others.

We are a mixture of strengths and weaknesses. At times, we need support; at other times, we are the support. That is how healthy relationships work.

But beneath our abilities and limitations, there is something deeper: you are loved by God, and your life has purpose.

When you begin to understand your worth, you also begin to recognize that your contribution matters. You are not here by accident. Your presence, your gifts, your story — they all have meaning.

As you grow emotionally and spiritually, your beliefs about yourself and your purpose shape the direction of your life. What you believe about your worth will either limit you or release you into your calling.

Boundaries

Discussing your value naturally leads to talking about establishing healthy boundaries.

Spend a few minutes of quiet, alone time thinking about where your boundaries are lax or unhealthy. This could be concerning your career needs and your relationships. Our relationships can affect our success.

I have listed some questions below for you to meditate on and answer.

Write your answers in your journal. Having a journal or notebook is helpful because you can go back and reread what you wrote at any point in time. Handwriting helps us develop a deeper conceptual understanding than just thinking about the answers. The insights you receive tend to last longer and become more deeply embedded.  

• Are there people who drain your energy? List them down.

• How does their behavior affect your life, mood, or performance when you are around them?

• Is anyone not supporting you or your career in the best way possible? List these down. These could be bosses, managers, agents, friends, and family.

• List down the boundaries you are willing to start putting into practice, e.g., not picking up the phone when people call after 10 p.m., not allowing people to continually criticize you negatively, not allowing people who take advantage of your time, energy, and money without giving back. 

• How does putting these boundaries in place help you to feel? If even thinking about these boundaries causes you anxiety, then try EFT-Tapping. It takes time to change our habits, and we may encounter pushback from those who are accustomed to taking advantage of us. They can be master manipulators. EFT can help you to stand firm and persevere, especially when it is terrifying to stand up for yourself.

• Are there people in your life who are positive, encouraging, loving, and holding you accountable for being the best you? List them down.

• How do you feel around them, and how does their influence affect your work, your sense of self, and how you show up in the world? List these insights down.

• What actions could you take to attract more positive, life-affirming, supportive people?

• What other actions can you take that would be respectful of your emotional health and balance?

Gratitude

• List 5 to 10 things you are grateful for.

Always list those things you are grateful for daily; thinking about and acknowledging the good in your life lifts your mood and energy levels.

Life is short, and we only have so much energy. We must establish healthy boundaries around certain people and activities, including family members, if they are not supportive.

Don’t let anyone (especially yourself) doubt you or bring you down—unless, of course, it is loving and constructive feedback. 

Burnout Warning Signs

Give to others—yes. Make sacrifices—of course. I am not suggesting life should revolve around you. But balance matters.

If you begin to feel exhausted, burned out, resentful, or if you lose joy in your work, take those feelings seriously. They are warning signs. Pause and ask yourself:
Am I caring for myself? Am I honoring my own needs?

Sometimes growth means adjusting relationships. You may need to create distance from people who repeatedly disregard your boundaries. In some cases, it may mean limiting contact—or letting go.

In your work life, it may mean transitioning into an environment that is healthier, more respectful, and aligned with your values.

Healthy boundaries are one of the simplest and most powerful ways to make that possible.

You are worth that care.

If you would like support in establishing healthier boundaries or improving your work–life balance, I offer a complimentary 20-minute call. Click this link Book a Call. I would be honored to support you in releasing what stands in the way of your freedom and joy.

Related Articles:
How to Discover Your Life’s Messages
How to Spark Joy in your Life
Live your Dreams Now before it's Too Late

Love,